Grappling With Divinity

Contemplative Christian Reflections by Robert Van Valkenburgh

Grappling With Divinity.
Wrestling With God.
Returning To Love.


What I Write About

At Grappling With Divinity, I write from within the living stream of Christian mysticism and contemplative prayer, where faith is not mastered but practiced — slowly, honestly, and with reverence.

These reflections explore divine love as it meets us in suffering and joy, doubt and surrender, weakness and awakening. They trace the quiet work of conversion — the lifelong unfolding of grace that reshapes the heart and draws us deeper into union with God.

Here you will find meditations on Scripture, spiritual formation, the wisdom of the mystics, and the hidden movements of God within ordinary life.

This is not a place for easy answers.

It is a place for
Grappling With Divinity.
Wrestling With God.
Returning To Love.

A place where faith deepens through mystery, and where even our struggle becomes prayer.

Lectio Divina (Coming Soon)

My writing follows the ancient rhythm of lectio divina — listening, reflecting, praying, and resting in God. Here you’ll find guidance and reflections shaped by this contemplative way of reading Scripture for transformation, not just information.

Practice Lectio Divina →

Christian Mysticism (Coming Soon)

Christian mysticism is the path of deeper union with God. Drawing from the wisdom of the contemplative tradition, this section reflects on divine love, interior transformation, and the indwelling presence of God at the heart of ordinary life.

Explore Christian Mysticism

Spiritual Direction (Coming Soon)

Spiritual direction is the sacred practice of listening for God together. Rooted in the contemplative tradition and informed by my studies at Loyola University Chicago, this space explores discernment, surrender, and the quiet work of grace in everyday life.

Learn More About Spiritual Direction →


A Contemplative Rule Of Life

GRAPPLING WITH DIVINITY.
WRESTLING WITH GOD.
RETURNING TO LOVE.

Explore My Reflections

Following the contemplative rhythm of Lectio Divina
Moving from Attentive Reading (Lectio)
To Reflection (Meditatio)
To Prayerful Response (Oratio)
And finally into Silent Resting in God (Contemplatio)
Grappling With Divinity invites a slow unfolding of Scripture, Spiritual Wisdom, and Lived Experience.

  • Oratio Divina: Never Knew Silence

    Oratio Divina: Never Knew Silence

    A reflective spiritual poem by Robert Van Valkenburgh explores the journey from restlessness and self-centered striving into divine stillness, grace, and solitude. Through surrender and transformation, the soul discovers that true silence and comfort are found in God’s presence, where darkness becomes rest and solitude becomes communion.

  • Lectio Divina: At The Summit

    Lectio Divina: At The Summit

    This reflection on Pierre Teilhard de Chardin’s words explores the call to remain authentically oneself while continually growing in consciousness and love. It highlights the spiritual journey as an upward ascent toward unity with others and ultimately with God, where all paths of love and truth converge in divine communion.

  • Oratio Divina: Layer By Layer

    Oratio Divina: Layer By Layer

    This reflective poem traces a life shaped by the ongoing revelation of divine love. Moving breath by breath through darkness and light, it portrays spiritual growth as a gradual unveiling of the heart to the living presence of Christ. Rooted in contemplative Christian spirituality, the piece invites readers to recognize God’s loving presence unfolding…

  • Lectio Divina: Plea For The Weak

    Lectio Divina: Plea For The Weak

    This quote from Dietrich Bonhoeffer asserts that Christianity’s credibility rests on its radical resistance to violence, abuse of power, and pride, and on its unwavering commitment to defend the weak. Bonhoeffer frames Christian faith not as passive belief, but as an active moral protest that embodies humility, justice, and sacrificial love in the face…

  • Oratio Divina: Life Blooming

    Oratio Divina: Life Blooming

    This poetic meditation portrays God as the living water and eternal source of life, hope, and grace, unfolding divine love and wisdom within the soul. Using imagery of a flower blooming in God’s garden, the reflection invites readers to contemplate spiritual growth, divine intimacy, and the ongoing renewal of life in God’s presence.

  • Lectio Divina: Love Unfolding

    Lectio Divina: Love Unfolding

    This reflection explores God’s wholeness as perfect Love woven into all of reality, revealing how the Holy Spirit actively unfolds and makes visible that divine unity. Heidi Russell’s insight invites readers to see creation, redemption, and daily life as interconnected expressions of God’s loving presence at work in the world.

  • Oratio Divina: Say The Words

    Oratio Divina: Say The Words

    This reflective poem portrays a tender moment of prayer shared between a father and child, revealing faith in its most embodied and intimate form. Through childlike trust, humble obedience, and overflowing love, the piece explores how God’s promises are experienced in everyday moments of family life. It invites readers to consider prayer not as…

  • Lectio Divina: Far Away

    Lectio Divina: Far Away

    Thomas Merton warns against environments and relationships rooted in deception, mockery, and exploitation, urging believers to practice discernment and seek communities shaped by honesty, humility, and genuine love. This reflection highlights the spiritual danger of false friendship and the call to cultivate integrity and compassion in our shared life.

  • Oratio Divina: Consent To Wholeness

    Oratio Divina: Consent To Wholeness

    This contemplative prayer reflects on the movement from division to wholeness, rejecting the illusion of separateness and embracing unity with self, others, creation, and God. Rooted in the Christian vision of the imago Dei, the poem invites readers to consent to God’s reconciling work, discovering true communion in the God who is “all in…

  • Lectio Divina: Part Of The Whole

    Lectio Divina: Part Of The Whole

    Ilia Delio reframes sin not merely as wrongdoing, but as resistance to wholeness and communion. Sin is the refusal to participate in the larger life of God and creation, while spiritual transformation invites us into unity, belonging, and whole-making love.

  • Owe Nothing But Love: Theodoret of Cyrus on Love as the Fulfilling of the Law (Lectio Divina)

    What if the command to love was never a debt you could actually pay off? Theodoret of Cyrus reads Paul’s warning about owing nothing but love and finds something stranger than an obligation — a debt that grows the more it’s paid, rather than shrinking. This reflection sits with what it feels like to carry…

  • No Longer Carved in Stone: Augustine of Hippo and Love as God’s One Law (Lectio Divina)

    What if the law you can’t seem to keep was never meant to be kept from outside at all? Augustine insists something was written into you long before you ever tried, and failed, to obey a command pressed on you from without.

  • Even a Pin Picked Up in Love: Thérèse of Lisieux and the Little Way of Sabbath (Lectio Divina)

    What if the smallest thing you do today — a pin lifted from the floor, a quiet hour handed over — carries more weight than the great things you keep waiting to do? Thérèse of Lisieux hints at a strange arithmetic of love, and this reflection sits with the Sabbath we keep so imperfectly, and…