Lectio:
“It is very important for a soul that is practicing prayer… to have someone to consult, especially in the beginning.”
— Teresa of Ávila, The Book of Her Life (paraphrase)
Meditatio:
As we take our first steps on the spiritual path, we may be nervous—worried that we will make a mistake and get lost, that our newfound faith is not strong enough to lead us through the dense forest ahead, or even that we were wrong to trust God at all—that He will not be with us along the way (Proverbs 3:5–6).
But with each faithful step, we find that the path appears before us, broader and more spacious than we imagined. Though we may stumble or wander into the woods from time to time, we are gently led back to the footpath, well worn by the footsteps of fellow travelers and those who walked this way before us (Psalm 37:23–24).
As we go farther, however, we begin to notice that the path is not as easy to see. Obstacles increase, and it becomes easier to lose our way. We look around and find that we have fewer companions than before. Many who started this journey with us have either fallen away or chosen the comfort of familiarity from which they came. The path is less worn because few have made it this far.
We are entering the dark unknown—the dense woods of deep spiritual union—an invitation extended to all, yet one to which few consent and fewer still dare to enter. The farther we go, the more difficult it becomes to find spiritual companions.
This is the narrow gate—the narrow path—that Jesus spoke of (Matthew 7:13–14).
We are never alone on this journey, for we have been given the Holy Spirit (John 15:26–27).
And yet, it is not good for us to be alone in our humanity (Genesis 2:18), especially on the spiritual path.
For this reason, we would do well to seek out a spiritual companion—a sensei (先生), literally “one who comes before,” whose footsteps we may follow—someone who can assure us that we are not crazy, that these experiences are real—indeed, that there is nothing more real than the spiritual experiences we have had and are having.
While we may not always find such a companion in person, we can take comfort in the fact that many men and women have gone this way before us. They have left breadcrumbs to follow, trail markers to keep us on the path, and words of comfort and companionship to steady us when we feel lost and alone in the darkness of letting go.
In addition to Scripture, we are fortunate to live in an era when these voices are so readily available to us. Unlike in the time of Teresa of Avila, John of the Cross, or Meister Eckhart—who were sometimes accused of madness or heresy for speaking of such experiences—these generous mystics, along with others such as Thomas Merton, James Finley, and Thomas Keating, are now only a page or a click away.
All of this is to say:
If, by God’s grace, you find yourself called to this path of divine union, yet at times feel lost in the dark woods and alone in the thick of the forest, you are not the first—and you will not be the last.
Cry out to your Father, who hears your prayers (Psalm 34:17). Reach out to the mystics and the saints who have prayed these same prayers before you. Seek out a priest, mentor, or spiritual director who is also walking this mystical path.
Your prayers will not go unanswered.
“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them” (Matthew 18:20).
Oratio:
Feet — stray not
from consolation,
where the Spirit,
saints, and angels
lead.
Wander not
toward desolation.
Let not sin
imprison me.
Walk me toward
the gates of heaven.
Take me home —
set me free.
Contemplatio:
Do I trust that God guides my steps even when the way feels hidden and I walk with few companions?
Related Scripture:
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight…and run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith.” (Hebrews 12:1-2 ESV)
For Further Reading:
If you enjoyed this post, you may also want to read Into the Void: Falling, Letting Go, and Finding God in the Abyss
~Robert Van Valkenburgh
Grappling With Divinity.
Wrestling With God.
Returning To Love.
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