Lectio
“…and so we chasten ourselves far better by a quiet steadfast repentance, than by eager hasty ways of penitence, which, in fact, are proportioned not by the weight of our faults, but according to our feelings and inclinations.”
— St. Francis De Sales, Introduction to the Devout Life
Meditatio
God judges us for our sins, but, through Christ, forgiveness has already been won for us. That forgiveness becomes truly ours through contrition, confession, and satisfaction — not because anything is lacking in what Christ accomplished, but because we are invited to participate in it, filling up in our own flesh, as Saint Paul says, ‘what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions’ for the sake of his Body (Colossians 1:24) — the acts by which we receive what Christ has already accomplished on the Cross.
God’s desire is not that we remain in a state of judgment. He loves us too much to want us to suffer in this way, now or for eternity. God wants us to be reconciled to Him, to accept the sacrifice He has so freely offered us in Christ, and to abide in His grace, love, and mercy now and forever. God’s desire is that we join Him, that, through Christ, we are grafted onto Him in love, and that we live our lives out in love for His sake and our own.
And so He gives us, in Himself, the means of repentance, conversion, and salvation. When we sin, by His grace, He welcomes us back into communion with Him. We need not, therefore, wander in the wilderness of our sins, no matter how many times we return to this desolation and distance from His love. And we certainly need not punish ourselves for our mistakes, shortcomings, and wrongdoings. Our separation from God — from Love — and all that costs us is punishment enough.
God does not ask for frantic repentance. A repentance driven by fear of ourselves — by self-imposed disgust at what we’ve done, or by the need to prove to God (or to ourselves) that we’re sorry enough — measures itself by the intensity of our feeling rather than by the truth of what is asked of us. This worldly grief, rooted in pride rather than contrition, produces only death (2 Corinthians 7:10). Godly grief is different, as it produces a repentance that leads to salvation, one that leaves no regret behind it, because it isn’t manufacturing its own worthiness moment to moment. Godly grief allows God to be God and to do His work of healing and transformation, using our lives to His purpose, no matter how far down the scale we have gone. It simply returns, again and again, to the God who has already turned toward us and forgiven us.
Oratio
For Me
Christ’s sacrifice
is sufficient
for me
I needn’t crucify myself
for my sins
although I try
to make up
for what is lacking
in me
with me
but He asks not this
of me
only that I accept Him
with all of me
His body
His blood
given over
to the Father
for me
Contemplatio
Whatever you have done, however far down the scale you have gone, He is already turned toward you — looking at you, looking for you. Turn back to Him. Let your repentance be quiet, prayerful, and humble. Rest here a while longer, offering no resistance to His presence, and let Him do with you what only He can do.
Related Scripture
“He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as the heavens are high above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far he removes our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion for his children, so the Lord has compassion for those who fear him. For he knows how we were made; he remembers that we are dust.”
— Psalm 103:10-14 (NRSVCE)
For Further Reading
If you enjoyed this post, you may also like Hate the Sickness, Not the Sick: Amma Syncletica of the Desert on Forgiveness and the Cross, which turns this post’s theme of receiving God’s forgiveness without self-punishment toward the harder work of extending that same grace to those who have wronged us.
Robert Van Valkenburgh
Grappling With Divinity.
Wrestling With God.
Returning To Love.
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